my Grandma

My Grandma was born November 3, 1924, and passed away on December 4, 2010 after over a month in the hospital, and many ups and downs. She had her 86th birthday in the hospital, roused enough to be moved to a rehabilitation center for a short while, then ended up back in the hospital on life support for a stretch, only to make another comeback. I think she once again proved what we already knew. That she was an inwardly strong woman, determined, not one to give up.

My sisters were able to visit her in the hospital about 12 hours before she left this earth, and while she wasn't opening her eyes or responding, there was one incident that they shared that brought both laughter and tears to my eyes.

If you knew my Uncle Billy, who still lived with my Grandma, you'd know that they had an interesting relationship. Sarcasm (Pittsburgh-style) was woven thru many of the fibers of their relationship, and if there was a jab to be made, it was (both ways). So that afternoon at the hospital, my uncle told my sisters that she wasn't speaking because she was mad at him. So my sister said "Grandma, you're not mad at Uncle Billy, are you?!!" and underneath the oxygen mask and other medical paraphernalia , they saw her shake her head no. For some reason this made me laugh...it was just like Grandma to still have some luster in her, and at the same time it brought tears to my eyes, the silent acknowledgement of love.

My Grandma Barclay ("Grandma Barky" to me as a little one) wasn't your typical soft, squishy, lovey dovey Grandma. She was more of the spit-fire variety. She told it like it was. There were no bushes to be found in her world, and if there had been, she wouldn't have ever been caught beating around them, haha. She was one to tell you, point blank, that she really didn't care for the flowers that you had brought her, or didn't like the candy you'd given her, or that you were 15 minutes later than you were supposed to be. And you certainly knew that there were certain hours to never call or visit...like before 1:00pm or while her stories (soaps) were on.

So what kept bringing me back to visit her summer after summer? First of all, you knew that even though she found it hard to show, that your visits meant something to her. You may not have known at the time how appreciative she was to see you, but you would most definitely hear about it if she felt like we hadn't made time for her. She would also comment to my mother on what a nice picture i had sent of the kids, or what some gesture i had made meant to her.

She would take the time to ask the kids how they were doing, and would often leave our visits with something that she knew you would make good use of, whether it was an old barbie doll or troll doll (haha), her old knitting needles and yarn, her keyboard gifted to her musically interested great-granddaughter, or some other sort of treasure. It seemed to be her way of silently showing her love. When I was about 12, she gave me an art easel for a gift, and while i remember feeling disappointed at the time, i can appreciate that she saw a gift in me at that point that even I didn't see.

And she *was* our extended family growing up. If there was any family to come visit over the holidays, it was her. I still remember the trips that we made with her as a child...Sea World, Lake Erie, Niagra Falls. She gave us a chance to see the world outside of our four walls. Little did she know that those first tastes of travel would nudge me towards future missionary trips that would take me across the world.

She worked hard as a single mother of 3, to give her children a better life. My Mom said that she didn't complain, and that they never fully realized at the time the hardships they had lived with. When her body had allowed her, my Grandma used to golf, bowl, swim, and get out and enjoy life. A family member reminisced that she was a 70's woman in the 50's. >smile<

There are two pieces of jewelry that I will always treasure. The first is a gold heart ring that she gave to me for my 16th birthday, 21 years ago.

The second is a necklace I gave her for her 80th birthday. Although I am unable to attend her Memorial service, it touches me to know that it was chosen for her to wear. Rest in peace, Grandma.

Silent Monks Singing Halleluia

BLESS THE LORD (Taizé)

My year began focused on the following verses,
which I felt were to be my theme for 2010.

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me bless his holy name.
Bless the Lord, O my soul, and do not forget all his benefits...

And tonight, at my first ever Taize worship service,
the song below was the opening song.
(video not related to the service I attended)

Bless the Lord, my soul, and bless God's holy name
Bless the Lord, my soul, who leads me into life.



It was a beautiful, reflective service, and a wonderful start to my Thanksgiving.

Comeback

In searching for open blog names....I must say i am amazed at how many deserted blogs there are out there. Sad to say, my blog has been in the running to join this category of lifeless, dead blogs. SO, i think that i am going to resurrect mine! yay!

The best thing i have to share today is that our townhome finally has a renter!!! What a HUGE relief for us. Now we can enjoy our home and plant our feet here in our new community, wholeheartedly.

This move has been full of ups and downs, but i can see how good God has been. We have some friendly neighbors (even if they are a little different from me, haha) and i have made a few "in the beginning-stages" friends, one of whom is at our bus-stop...i should start calling her my five minute friend ;-) I've also been blessed to see familiar friends a few times, and to be reminded that although we have moved, our lives are still intertwined with wonderful people who will always be a part of our lives (if i have any say in it!!!)

SO, if you are still reading, stick around. :)

it's been

way too long since i've blogged >blush<

i took 3 months off from my favorite website online, so i wasn't around the net much. but i'm back, and trying to keep life balanced. smile.

i think the most exciting development for me has been the progress that we've made on reading the Bible. I have always struggled to read through the Old Testament, and so I have been reading thru the Bible with the "One Year Bible" which has so many great resources online. I especially love the widget on the side of my blog which allows me to listen to the daily reading. That way when i get bogged down in the historical parts of the O.T. it helps me to absorb what is happening.

Another positive. I had been trying to force a Bible reading time into our family's schedule that was just not working for us. I felt really frustrated because i knew it was something important to do. So, God gave me an answer and helped me think "outside the box" and showed me that it was time to simply meet each of the kids where they're at.

With Luke, he has been enjoying "The Picture Bible" which has the Bible Stories in cartoon form. I read the captions and he reads the bubble words. Our goal is one lesson/night, but he often wants to keep going and read 2 or 3. the pictures really resonate with him, which is wonderful!

With Grace, she and I are reading the New Testament portion together. We're so busy here, that most days we end up reading in the van. Deuteronomy says we are to talk about His word when we "walk by the way" aka "drive in the van" lol. The Serendipity Bible has some great questions and thought provokers in the margin that we've been using in addition to the portion of Scripture.

Other than that, Luke is feeling better from strep (his third bout since the new year) and now we think Grace has it (sorry Trina). Loren takes his big P.E. test (professional engineer) on Friday and we are hoping that he will be able to pass the first time....it's been 18 years since he graduated from college, so i have to give him credit for attempting this! We have some decisions to make about whether or not to move this summer and should know more soon! So of course any prayers are appreciated as we navigate through this season. I think we are ready to have some finality since we've been waiting for 9 months for some clarity. However, God has taught me so much about trusting in Him during this waiting period that i didn't expect. should i be surprised?! ;-)

Bargains, bargains, bargains

If you are looking for some great bargains in the Springs, check this out!

http://springsbargains.com/

Simple Woman's Daybook

Outside my window...it's growing dusk, and soon the cold front will blow through and bring more snow. I realized that because we haven't packed up Christmas decorations, our outdoor ones stick out. this weekend will have to be soon enough.

I am thinking...about the generations past and the generations to come. about how I long for deeper connections with the generations before me. Every time i see a set of generations together (grandparent, child, and grandchildren) it does something funny to my heart.

I am thankful for...routine! i'm working at settling back into one, and i appreciate the normalacy that comes with routine. although the holidays really were wonderful too.

From the kitchen...the oven is on, and dinner is a cookin. i rearranged my kitchen for winter, and took the harvesty decorations down. My favorite holly berry wreath is hanging above my cabinets, which is definitely the touch that pulled it all together for me. My daughter also helped me, and thought it was so clever that we put a sign above the oven that reads "Kindess always warms the heart" ;-)

I am wearing...grey courderoys, a funky dark magenta shirt layered over a black shirt, and pigtails. my dr. even complimented me on my shirt today, and with her compliments are hard to come by, lol.

I am creating...DOVES. made out of paper plates, with tissue paper glued on. they're for my kiddos at church. they're actually turning out cuter than i pictured them.

I am reading..."A Window to the World" by Susan Meissner. It's about a girl whose best friend is kidnapped during the summer of their 8th year, and about how that colors Megan's way of viewing the world. i'm over half way through...(and i must admit i read ahead a little bit. yes, i'm one of those, lol)

I am hoping...that my MIL is responding to the chemo.

I am hearing...the sounds of "Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs". It takes a lot for me to sit down through an entire movie. I used to shake my head in wonder at my Mom who never sat through a movie, and now i *completely* understand, haha.

Around the house...we still have piles of Christmas gifts and decorations.

Here's a picture for thought I am sharing:

God is with us

"they shall call him Immanuel, which means 'God with us.'"

as we face all of the unknowns of 2010, this is the anchor that gives me hope.

God is Immanuel, and He is with me. He will not leave me or forsake me.

To quote the apostle Paul, I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

this is what i'm meditating on as i bring in the New Year. :-)