Our House Rules

Our House Rules

Love God and Love each other

Be Generous with Hugs and Warm Words

Be Patient and Respect each other

Practice Forgiveness
Be Kind and Tenderhearted

Pray Often Live with a Thankful Heart

Gratitude Continued

i have a new goal. I haven't figured out how to link to it, but there is a circle of bloggers who are aiming to reach 1,000 things to be thankful for, so I am going to cumulatively count my thanksgivings. I know what you're thinking..."Better you than me" :)



6. in honor of my last post, i am thankful for my curly-ish hair ;) i don't always give in to the curliness, but i love that i have the option.

7. i am grateful for my friday night Bible study circle of friends. really, they are so much more than that. how can you limit a group of friends to one time slot, lol. i can't. these are my core group of friends that i know that, no matter what, they care about me for who i am, strengths and weaknesses and all, and it is such a joy to be a part of their lives.

8. i'm grateful for my hubby, who works hard to provide for our family, and that he doesn't make me feel bad about it in order to make himself feel better.

9. i'm thankful for the opportunity to play tennis with my son. even if the ball rarely makes it back over the net. (stop laughing!) hopefully when he is famous one day he'll credit me with having pointed him the the right direction. haha.

10. i'm thankful for the free swimming i'll get to do at the ymca this week, just because of where i work. what a cool perk to have this week, and a great way to end the summer with my kids.

1. I'm grateful for my wonderful family...I know they are always there, and accept me for who I am.

2. I'm grateful for summer. For the peaceful, leisurely days that we can enjoy, even if it is going faster than i'd like.

3. I'm grateful for the lift that good music can bring me.

4. I'm grateful for the insurance we have. Though it may bring headaches and stress, it is a blessing i must acknowledge!

5. I'm grateful for my current health. I had fun playing volleyball last week, and despite what i cannot do, i'm thankful for the many things i CAN do!

i'm grateful for

*turnarounds to a bad day with something as simple as love and a listening ear

*grandpas

*quiet moments with a cup of spiced chai tea

*Christmas carols playing everywhere I go

*God's grace that helps us in every circumstance

*recipes passed on to the next generation

*sisters to call

*a warm home with fires burning

5 days post surgery

I am now 5 days post-surgery, and doing well. dr. W ended up doing a lapriscopically-assisted vaginal hysterectomy, and he removed my uterus and cervix. When he went in with the scope, he found what he believed to be a grapefruit-sized degenerating fibroid. so he felt he could safely do surgery without doing a big 'ole abdominal incision. boy was i ever surprised, because he had been pretty certain he would have to open me up.

I am enjoying the quietness of the day, being able to chill out on the couch and crochet (I made a bible cover yesterday), read my Bible, journal, and also enjoy a little time with my mom. it had been 4.5 years since she was last here. We both have the same sense of humor (oh, you didn't know i had one, did ya?!) and so there are times where i'm telling her "stop! please stop!" cause i am howling from her stories.

Part of me is eager to be on the mend. I like to stay busy, and am fairly independent. It's humbling to need help. Part of me doesn't want the restfulness to end. It's been restful for my soul to have this time.

One thing that i've definitely come out of this experience is recognizing how much i need community, and need my brothers and sisters in Christ. whether it has been a card, a phone call, a meal, an email, a ride for my kids, or a visit, I have been blessed in so many ways by the fellowship that has surrounded me and my family during this season. We left ministry 3 years ago, and I think that I got to the point where I didn't want community at that time. I had been burnt in some ways that took time to heal from. And I've been awakened to the pain and suffering and hurt that is in the lives of so very many. My own pain and suffering opened my eyes to the needs of those around me. I don't want to go back to being an island. Lord, help me to find the way in which I can make a difference in those around me, and be your comforting and loving hands and feet in this community.

I choose gentleness

I CHOOSE GENTLENESS…

Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle.
If I raise my voice, may it be only in praise.
If I clench my fist, may it only be in prayer.
If I make a demand, may it only be of myself.

Max Lucado

Walk in love

God has really been convicting me lately that He wants me to be a person who loves others, and sees them as his loved creation. I have been convicted for awhile now that I am too focused on task, and it was really apparent to me at work, where i see that my relationships have been suffering with conflict because i am not taking the time to care about people.

My prayer about 3 weeks ago was "help my work to be about people. not tasks. please show me what this means, practically. how to do this. how to live a life of love. how to imitate God in this area." Even though I knew what was wrong, and that God wanted me to love others, I couldn't see HOW to do this! So this weekend at church, I had Kurt pray with me, and I believe it was in response to my seeking Him in this way that He opened my eyes! It's been a work that God is doing in me, but it all came together for me this past weekend.

God showed me that life is not a business contract. i have been operating with people out of necessity, not out of desire. if i go to the store, i would be pleasant, but not pleased to be interacting with other people. they were an means to an end. My experiences in missions and support raising also contributed to viewing people as a resource :( AND God just opened my eyes to show me that my relationship with HIm is not a contract either where i am to be following Him because he is a means to an end.

People are important! God is giving me a new love for people, and helping me to set aside the judgement that i have struggled with for so long, and to embrace people...faults, weaknesses and all.

Jesus didn't just focus on the task of giving his life for us. He could have come, skipped ministering to people, caring about people, loving people, and simply given His life for us. Instead, He did it in love. (Gal. 2:20 "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who LOVED ME, and gave himself for me.")

Eph. 5:1-2 "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. WALK IN LOVE, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."

God wants me to love Him, and to love others. to love my neighbor in the same way i myself long to be loved. we are His hands and His feet. He has commanded us to love one another, that our joy may be made complete.

so what does this look like? taking a genuine interest in the people around me. seeing them! making eye contact. asking them about themselves. serving them, loving them in whatever way presents itself. reaching out to others to let them know you care. stopping to talk instead of walking by. believing the best, assuming postive intent instead of jumping to the worst conclusion. giving the benefit of the doubt. walking in grace. reflecting feelings and showing compassion. going out of my way to think of someone and call them to ask if you can meet a need. God did not intend for me to recluse myself in my house with just my family. I can be a catalyst to show them and lead them to learn how to love others. i need to seek for what i can learn from others. I can be open to relationship and to seeing what God will do in our lives corporately. God uses us in each others lives. Perhaps i have not discovered completely who i am, because i have been hiding. it is in relationship that you learn about yourself, that you reveal yourself, that you share who you are.

Lord, i pray that you would help me to continue to grow in this area. I want to love unconditionally and unselfishly. Not holding back in sharing today what i can with others. If you give me opportunity, may i speak of your love and share the hope that i have.

UPDATE 11/14:
I had several connections with people today that i normally don't have. I was able to genuinely pray for and listen to and love D at work re: her situation. i connected more with the moms at MMO and engaged them more in conversation than normal. S bore her heart to me about her situation with her MIL, and we embraced in a hug. I am so amazed at how God is opening doors for me in relationship to those around me. i am not afraid to talk to others. if i am thinking about how i can love and care for someone, then i am not thinking about what they are thinking about me, if that makes sense.

the Glad Game...

I feel compelled to play the glad game. It is the game Pollyanna played, about finding the silver lining in every cloud, and finding something to be glad about. "in everything give thanks, for this is the will of God"

so here are my attempts.

1. even though we don't have our own yard, i'm glad we have a playhouse and kiddie pool on our back patio, and that they can play in the common area safely.

2. i was having a wierd day today, so I made the choice to turn the day around, and went up to get a shower so that my day would feel like it was starting over. It worked!

3. I never got to see fireworks as a kid. I'm glad that i've had so many chances to see them as an adult, and can give that special memory to my kids. we weren't wanting to fight the crowds at the park tonite, but going on the garage rooftop ended up to be really quiet and very memorable! We could see all of the fireworks all over the city...it was so fun!

4. I'm glad that my kids are the ages they are. Tigeroo is little enough for me still to hold, and Miley fits just under my chin and i can easily still wrap her in my arms. In their own way, I can still cuddle them and be close to them. Help me enjoy them just the way they are Lord, and never be in a hurry for them to grow up.

5. I had to have my root canal retreated, and thru it all, I'm glad that i have dental insurance now to help defray the cost. I'm glad i found a great endodontist that i'm 100% comfortable with, and I"m glad i have a sister back in PA who's a dental assistant and gives good advice, and mostly, I"m just glad it's over, lol!

9 steps...

These are 9 steps that I came up with to be proactive in my struggle with anger.

1. Jesus is the unseen guest in my home, and I CAN hold my temper at home just as well as I do in public.
2. When I yell, it affects who my children are, and how they view themselves.
3. People are more important than things. It is better to be late, than to verbally damage my kids and be on time.
4. Use the power in my words instead of the power in my voice. Seek to influence rather than intimidate.
5. Plan ahead of time, so that time deadlines for being out the door are not as stressful (turn off tv earlier)
6. Go to my children (step 2) to make a 2nd request.
7. When I feel my blood pressure rising, take a deep breath and calm myself down.
8. Re-examine my agenda to see what can be changed so that everyone’s needs (including my own) are better met.
9. Focus on ONE thing at a time, instead of thinking of ALL that needs done.

Power of a Postive Face

The power of a positive face
reflection from Sparkpeople.com

"Have you ever contemplated how much a smile can change a person's day? Both the person who smiles and the one who sees it are positively impacted by such a small act. This seemingly tiny reflex can perk up a bad attitude, make you seem more warm and inviting, and often pass some happiness on to others. So the next time your alarm goes off for your 5 a.m. run or your dog barks in the middle of the night, smile instead of grumbling. You'd be surprised how a positive face can in turn become a positive and motivational attitude! "

i've been contemplating lately how i really want to be a more positive person. for me, it usually takes being purposeful about being positive, as it is easier to grumble or complain and to find the negative things to focus on. i mean, if you're looking for them (the negative), you're sure to find them! i find that if my focus is to assign positive intent to others and offer mercy, that my filter is a more compassionate one. So, something as small as a smile can be a way to be a more positive person. usually i'm concerned of being the goofy person walking around with a smile (hehe) but i think that when it's in an applicable situation, esp. one where it would be easy to get frustrated and impatient, that a smile would go a long ways towards being a positive influence.

"Everytime you smile at someone, it is an action of love, a gift to that person, a beautiful thing." Mother Teresa