pure joy

Coming into 2009, the comments i kept receiving from friends were that 2009 had to be better than 2008 (in terms of all the trials that i went thru the 2nd half of 2008). While that sounds great, i think that i've come to realize (as of the 2nd week of january, if not before, lol.) that life is just going to be full of trials, and i had better get used to it. really. at first that possibly sounds cynical, but it's not meant that way. I used to think that if i was serving God and "in the center of his will" that i in some way could expect things in my life to just fall into place. That I would be somehow protected from pain and suffering. Perhaps that's part of the reason why i stayed in my little christian bubble at ywam for so long. But that's a whole nother train of thought best kept for another post.

anyhow, i am learning that trials WILL come. It doesn't mean that i am in sin, or that i have somehow "missed the boat". The Bible says that even Jesus learned obedience through the things that he suffered. Who am I to expect any less?

Can I say that i am at the point that i can consider it joy that these trials come, as Paul encourages us in James? that would probably be stretching it. But i no longer see it as something to be ashamed of, or as a sign of some failure on my part. I'm learning to find a place of peace within the storms that come, and am grateful for the breathing space that comes between the trials in which i can look back and reflect on the ways in which God's presence and grace brought me through that trial. For an opportunity to draw near to God and grow in my love and dependance upon Him.

It wasn't until i had Gracey that i understood what it meant for God to "uphold us with his righteous right hand." One day Gracey and I were walking down the stairs of our 3 story apartment, and she stumbled on a stair. Had I not been holding her hand, she would have plunged down those stairs. Yep, she was literally dangling in my hands for a second, but she was safe. And God gave me an image of him holding me in the same way...as my loving heavenly Father.

I was reading my devotional today, and the words in Psalm 37 "trust in the Lord, and do good." jumped off the page as never before. I was getting ready to head into work, and was preparing my heart for what the morning held. I was looking for one gold nugget to meditate on that morning. And those 7 simple words gripped my heart...."trust in the Lord, and do good." What an amazing, wonderful command. It can be so easy for me to make following Christ more complicated than it needs to be. And here it was. very simple. trust in the Lord. and do good.